Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Politician To Peers: "Let Me Pee In Peace!"

In a disturbing case of petty, potty politics, Europe's first transgender lawmaker is fighting for his/her right to pee in the place of his/her picking. [Yes, you read that right.] Describing the proposal that s/he have a separate bathroom as "the apartheid of urinary segregation," the peckerless parliamentarian said, "I don't want the privilege of having a toilet all to myself."

Wait ... excuse me ... did you just say, the "apartheid of urinary segregation"? The "apartheid"?? You're seriously comparing your toilet troubles to the "apartheid"? For real? Wow.

Look, man ... er ... I mean, lady: I'm all for urinary equality - after all, I'm known for sneaking into the men's room when the line to the ladies' room is too long - but let's get real. I mean, I don't know how much you know about the actual "apartheid" [or as I prefer to call it: "the horrible history of race relations in South Africa"], but I'd certainly appreciate it if you wouldn't whip that word out during your personal pissing contest, 'kay? Cheers.

Oh, and one more thing: Are you trying to look like an aging Boy George, or is that just a sad (and unavoidable) coincidence? Never mind - I think I answered my own question.

Sassy Squats

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